Heartbroken....

It has now been over 48 hours since the tragedy that we have all come to know as #SandyHook. Sandy Hook, was a small community many of us new nothing about, that was until Friday Dec 14, 2012 our nation learned about them in the worst way..

Reports 10 kids, then 12, then 2 adults.. then 16 kids.. through out the morning, news centers as www.cnn.com , www.foxnews.com , your local stations started showing #BREAKING NEWS reports.. Gunman walks in and terrorizes school.. By the end of the afternoon, a total of 20 children & 6 adults were gone... Lives will forever be changed.. I am forever changed...

Then the #Guncontrol idealists came out, (which to each their own). and there was crying over #GOD not being there? How DARE people think #GOD wasn't there?

Oh I guarentee he was right there, on the throne, WEEPING, yet knowing that his children were coming to him.. Waiting for them, with open arms.. HIS PLAN.. not ours.. We will never understand why THESE 20 children were taken, why THOSE 6 adults were taken, but they were. Parents, sisters, brothers, Grandparents, Aunts & Uncles.. Friends are left without their loved ones and people want to BLAME the guns, want to BLAME God...

I BLAME US.. Christians, for not fighting harder, for keeping quiet as we allowed people to take him AWAY from our schools, our sports, our business lives... We have been afraid to stand up because there are disenters among us. There are those who belive in other things.. and THEY don't want our GOD in their lives.. Which is FINE, but don't you DARE throw out "Where was YOUR GOD" how could YOUR GOD allow this to happen.

Wanna know why, because he is GOD, and "The Great I am" has a plan.. I have no idea, but I will turn to him and I will ask him to heal my hurt, my anger, and help me to forgive....

I am a Christian, I believe in Jesus Christ, and am saved. BUT I also know God didn't just allow US to be here...

My heartaches for every person who lost someone they loved, for everyone left who have to answer questions to their little ones who SURVIVED. This will not be an easy task, nor do I relish having to question it, and answer my nephews when they ask... BUT I will.

Monsters are REAL, they live in each of us, who get angry, who gossip on friends, who enjoy causing pain on those "THEY LOVE"... BUT inside those of us who are Christians, have the SPIRIT, who reminds us every day that we are failible, we are weak, and we give into temptaion.. FREE WILL.

 IT is when I take my eyes off GOD, the devil gets a foot hold, and the world and all temptations come rushing in.. I get lost and my life becomes crazy with drama, loss, anger, when I have fallen, I beg forgiveness from the Heavenly Father, I apologize to those who've been hurt by me, picks me up and in his grace, I find solace, healing, and acceptance..

So as you go through today remember the VICTIMS, not the shooter..
 Charlotte Bacon, 2/22/06, female
- Daniel Barden, 9/25/05, male
- Rachel Davino, 7/17/83, female.
- Olivia Engel, 7/18/06, female
- Josephine Gay, 12/11/05, female
- Ana M. Marquez-Greene, 04/04/06, female
- Dylan Hockley, 3/8/06, male
- Dawn Hochsprung, 06/28/65, female
- Madeleine F. Hsu, 7/10/06, female
- Catherine V. Hubbard, 6/08/06, female
- Chase Kowalski, 10/31/05, male
- Jesse Lewis, 6/30/06, male
- James Mattioli , 3/22/06, male
- Grace McDonnell, 12/04/05, female
- Anne Marie Murphy, 07/25/60, female
- Emilie Parker, 5/12/06, female
- Jack Pinto, 5/06/06, male
- Noah Pozner, 11/20/06, male
- Caroline Previdi, 9/07/06, female
- Jessica Rekos, 5/10/06, female
- Avielle Richman, 10/17/06, female
- Lauren Rousseau, 6/1982, female (full date of birth not specified)
- Mary Sherlach, 2/11/56, female
- Victoria Soto, 11/04/85, female
- Benjamin Wheeler, 9/12/06, male
- Allison N. Wyatt, 7/03/06, female
via http://www.huffingtonpost.com/

xo lovies remember THEM

PS I miss you every day, my heart and soul is with you... never doubt that the miles may separate us, but I am WITH you

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